• Unreleased
• Director: Ben Stiller
• Written by: Dan Harmon, Rob Schrab
• Running Time: 30 minutes
• Language: English
• MPAA Rating:
• Cast: Jack Black, Owen Wilson, Ron Silver, O-Lan Jones, Vincent Schiavelli, Christine Taylor, Ben Stiller

As I sit here at this computer most evenings, in the next room my family watches the TV. I myself often find myself out of touch with current TV culture, as most of what I watch on the cathode-ray tube comes off of a DVD or one of the many Movie stations, but I can't help catching glimpes and sounds in my peripheral senses, and I have to say it. Network Televison has gone right down the crapper.

I often hear wailing singing of crappola songs that reminds me of the time I went to Karaoke Night sober. Or else somebody is eating a bug or some animals testicle, and I'm saying to myself, lets see them eat some dog shit fresh out of a poodles ass like Divine did in Pink Flammingoes. And I'm not even going to begin to tell you what is wrong with those match-making shows, I KNOW how I'd pick the woman to marry, maybe they should make porno versions. All those reality shows are about as really real as the toothfairy.

It wasn't always so you know. There was a time when there were cool shows on TV. TV was still mindless entertainment, but the Network Execs still knew the difference between mindless and stupid...

HEAT VISION AND JACK takes us back to those days. Actually it is not even a movie, but rather a rejected TV pilot. Why it was rejected? I could not say. It's won awards. Who knows what the hell goes on in the mind of a TV Executive? I think it would have been a helluva series, certainly far superior to the idiocy on TV now.

HEAT VISON AND JACK is the brain child of the creative team Dan Harmon and Rob Schrab (Monster House), and was directed by Ben Stiller. This is definately the direction Televison should have went...action, adventure, comedy...all wrapped up into one series!!

Although made in 1999, the style is very reminiscent of late '70s/early 80's TV shows such as KNIGHT RIDER or THE SIX MILLION DOLLAR MAN mixed in with those live-action Kroft super-hero shows they used to have on Saturday mornings. It's almost like a funny parody of these shows, but HEAT VISON and JACK is played so straight, when I laughed, I thought back and figured if I ever saw an episode of Knight Rider again, I'd likely laugh at the same sorts of things in it. But what really makes this show entertaining is the use of cheesy TV visual effects, unbelievable!!!

The premise of the show involves this renagade astronaut (played by Jack Black) who, in a accident in space, has gained the power of super intellegence when exposed to the rays of the sun. He along with his roomate, whose mind and body has been fused inside a cool motorcyle, flee the evil minion of NASA, Ron Silver (played by himself), who want to remove his brain for experimentation. How cool is that!?! Check out the credit sequence:

In the pilot, Heat Vision and Jack come up against an alien intelligence named Paragon that travels through radio waves. This alien intelligence takes possession of the body of a Diner cook, played by Vincent Schiavelli, and goes about disintegrating 'monkey tramps' and anyone else who gets in his way. O-Lan Jones reprises her roll from Natural Born Killers as the diner's waitress and Paragon's first victim. Jack stumbles upon the aftermath in the diner and his super intelligence figures out the nature of the danger, but he also becomes the prime suspect as the local, and sexy, sheriff, played by Christine Taylor, finds him there. As Paragon's rampage continues, Jack and the sheriff team up for a final showdown at the local stip-bar. Ben Stiller pulls in a cameo as the DJ at the bar.

OK, you say...sounds good! But if it is a UNAIRED TV Pilot, how is it I get to see it?

I myself, got my copy from the MAN himself, Rob Schrab in a Tape Trade (and have since made a DVD copy) and he told me to distribute it freely because he wants everyone to see it (so if you meet up with me, ask me for a copy). That was back in the Tape Trading Days, but now we are in the 21st century. If you are reading this, you have the Internet. So use it! HEAT VISION AND JACK is available on all sorts of P2P file sharing sites. So go to your favourite Torrent Site and download it. And don't feel bad about it either. For once, you are NOT stealing it! This is what these Torrent sites are supposed to be for. Rob Schrab wants you to see it! Ben Stiller wants you to see it, so much in fact he even filmed a little introductory bit that you will see in most versions before the show begins. And after you have watched it, EMAIL FOX and tell them how cool you thought it was!!! Tell them how, considering the current box office draw of Jack Black, Ben Stiller, Owen Wilson, and the rest of the people involved, they must be kicking themselves in the ass for not picking up this show!!

And while you are searching for HEAT VISON AND JACK, or waiting for it to download , check out this other cool diddie by Rob Schrab:

It's fully cool and free to download from the site...Yes folks, some of the coolest flicks are free! Some people do make movies for reasons besides money. And TV does still suck!